I grew up in a small town in the 90's, where I was the only non-white girl in my class at school and my skin colour was a curiosity rather than a threat.
There was no racial tension, but then again, no sense of black community. There were quite literally no black people at all.
When people asked me about my ethnicity, I would often just mumble something about tanning easily and change the subject, and I brushed off racist slurs like any other insult. And nowhere is it more of an issue than in the world of dating and relationships.
Tinder offers a soul-destroying glimpse into the worst and most racist of humanity.
Some people fetishise non-white bodies. I know I have big lips. I am more interesting than my lips!
Some white guys have their own stupid ideas about race and will want to share them with you. I went on a disastrous first date recently with a guy I met on Tinder.
Like, err yeah, thanks Adam for that nugget of ignorance, you absolute bell-end. Adam also told me that he enjoyed watching Top Gear and was allergic to dogs so to be fair to him, it was never going to work out between us, even before the racism. I guess the lesson here is to have a more thorough screening process, maybe a set of questions that a guy has to answer via WhatsApp before you agree to go for a drink with him.
If your boyf is not a total douchebag, it will have occurred to him that "How to get a black girl to like you" has a massive economic and social advantage over most of the rest of the world. Check him with all his white male privilege, right? Is he supposed to get as angry about it as you do? So what do you think about FGM? The riots in Ferguson?
The lack of brown characters on Girls? The appropriation of black culture in the mainstream? Anything remotely race-related, he will want your perspective and expect you to have insight. All of this makes it sound like race defines my dating experiences, which is obviously not true at all. Going out with white boys is just as frustrating and fun as dating black guys or white girls or black girls. So get out there and date who you want!
No one date Adam.
Follow Yasmin on Twitter yasminlajoie. Sex And The Tinder Generation. Calling Bullshit On Micro Cheating: So what's it like to date white guys when you're not white?
on a date with someone else a month later and you die inside and have to drink all the wine to get over it. READ MORE: Things You Only Know If You're A Black Girl On Tinder.